1- I’m nearly in the middle of my 29th year of life which feels like a joke because LOL. I’m almost 30? That’s like, official adult age. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? Why is this happening? Where’re my kids, house and big bucks?
2- Big bucks, lol. I spent the first half of my 20s
diving cannonballing into debt, only to have spent the last half trying to climb out. While it’s a lesson I could have done without, I can honestly say that I’ve learned to appreciate a dollar. I’ve overcome a shopping addiction by learning the difference between a want and a need – Lines that were mega blurred back when I didn’t know the difference between a want and a need.
3- I believe all High Schoolers should at MINIMUM be forced to take a finance course during their final year. Before the banks and government loan them monies for school, before kids get excited about credit limits. A class that teaches about interest rates, savings and all that jazz – Because when I was handed over 20 thou at 18; My first thought was literally “SHOPPING”. I went crazy. “ I’ll pay it back with my next pay..” Yah. My friggin’ bi-weekly cheque of like, 3 hunnid dolla. I feel like our education system /SLASH THE GOVERNMENT is setting kids up for financial disaster. CONSPIRACY TO LOCK US ALL INTO DEBTS?! Unless you were a lucky kidlet with
rich informative parents, you end up like me. Or worse off! I do not want to know how much that 20 thou loan actually cost a non-College graduate like me in the long run….
4- I never graduated College! I was set to be a teacher – Though I fell into a big time depression after my first semester, and hearing everyone and their mother tell me that finding a job as a teacher would be “impossible” after I graduated, I soon dropped out. I tried Public Relations and a Business course shortly after, but nah. School just wasn’t my jam…
5- Because it’s not about what you know, but who you know! Something that’s proven to be true as every “real” job I’ve had was with the help of a friend and/or family member. Hey – When there are a thousand applicants, it’s nice to have someone help you stand out…
6- I’m going on nearly a year back into the workforce after having taken a year off to camp out and get back to nature. Long story short: My corporate job had turned into a sinking ship and my lifeboat was taking in a lot of water. My mental health was suffering as I was working for a company that was laying people off by the hundreds – Which lead to an unnecessary amount of workplace drama and animosities as middle-aged women took their stresses out on each other. I was given a window of opportunity (meaning a big chunk of land to explore), so I fucking jumped.
7- I picked up woodworking skills living up North, skills that provided me with a little extra cash monies during my unemployment!
8- My camp out was my second time running away – The only difference is that I didn’t run away from people the second time around, I ran away from the workforce. And the concrete jungle, ’cause fuck dat noise.
9- My first runaway was to England – I was 24, I’d been living in the same small town SINCE FOREVER, had been dating the same boy since I was 17, and felt as though I didn’t have any friends. Again, I was given a window of opportunity SO I JUMPED.
10 – I’ve struggled making/keeping friends since then. I feel as though I haven’t come across anyone that I’ve really connected with, no one with whom I really trust. But hey – I also haven’t exactly been looking/trying all that hard… People, man.
11- While it appears as though I’m one to jump at an opportunity; I’ve walked away, avoided, and turned down a coupl’a opportunities that I may not regret… But will beat myself up for when I’m having a “WTF LIFE” moment.
12- WTF LIFE moments are when I temporarily hate where I’m at, usually triggered by COMPARING MY LIFE TO OTHERS. I’ve even caught myself comparing my life to lives I wouldn’t necessarily want. The fuck, brain?
13- Like more than half the planet, I get bouts of anxiety. It’s crazy. I’m crazy. I get scared of… Everything. Everyone. Something happens where I’m able to convince myself to make poor decisions – Ones I’d never even consider making in my “normal” state. I think the worst bit is knowing I’m being ridiculous, knowing I’m doing something irresponsible, but not feeling as though I can stop myself.
14- MY GINGER is one of the few things (other than chocolate) that makes me feel better when I get into my funks. I’ve literally said the words “Shut up and hug me” – As sometimes all I need is a freaking hug. I suppose being as high energy as I am, it’s only natural to have my off days…
15- I’M HIGH ENERGY! I’m bubbly! I love being HAPPY! You’d never guess I was an anxious person, which totally plays into people thinking I’m flaky. I used to be afraid of annoying people, I used to shy away from coming across too intense – ‘Cause ew. I don’t wanna be that annoyingly happy girl! But I’ve realized that changing who I am to please others throws me into one of my funks faster than any kind of real world scary. For the most part, I like myself… I’m just easily swayed when I find out you don’t.
16- If you haven’t already guessed, I’m a people pleaser! I WILL MAKE YOU SMILE. Bonus if I can make you laugh. I don’t take life all that seriously, I see the humour in just about everything, and if I see that you’re hurting? You take centre stage. I’ve seen my fair share of dark days, Ima try to light up as many as I can.
17- I’m too nice for my own good. I’ve been used an abused by some folks that don’t know how to keep themselves happy. I can’t stay mad, I don’t hold grudges – But I will flake outta that relationship no problem.
18- I live my life in a way where everything is temporary. No job, no home, and no human is forever. Your moods will pass, the rain will go away, and the weekend WILL make its way back around.
19- I’M WORKING TO LIVE. Not the other way around. It’s been a long time coming and it’s taken a meltdown or two – But I’ve FINALLY found a balance between my work and home life.
20- Oh. To find balance? I took a pay decrease to turn my 3+hr a day commute into a 5-7 minute commute. My mental health has improved significantly since having ditched that daily drive. I HAVE SO MUCH TIME FOR ACTIVITIES.
21- Like actually moving my body! I’m getting to be halfway through my 29th year and I’m only just starting my “abs before 30!” resolution. LOL. As a girl who’s been soft her entire life, mayyybe it’s a stretch; But I’m not gettin’ any younger! And getting home from work hardly 5 minutes after it’s over and not feel deathly tired from waking up at 5:30 in the morning? Going for a jog or hitting up a Pilates class isn’t as torturous as it once felt. I mean, I’d rather not have to move… But that’s my lazy shit-pig self craving more time in bed.
22- BECAUSE BED IS MY FAVOURITE. Sickness, sadness, scaries, exhaustion – BED CURES ALL. I’ve just bought ALL new bedding for when my ginger and I move out and I CAN’T WAIT until we have a home.
23- Omg. I’M GONNA LIVE WITH A BOY. IN LESS THAN A WEEK! Ok. Maybe more like one week today I’ll be all “TOMORROW!!” I’M ADULTING SO HARD RN.
24- My man is my bestie. His love was totally unexpected. This December will mark 5 years – And I honestly can’t believe it’s been so long. He definitely challenged my “everything is temporary” feels.
25- Next comes marriage? Meh. Marriage isn’t nearly as important to me as it is to most. I love rings, so I want a pretty ring! I’m CLAIMED, boys! But the paper? The license? The witnesses? All I see are dollar signs. Dollar signs that I’d prefer were spent on me (and my ginj).
26- Kids? Not against ‘em, but I’ll have ‘em when I have ‘em. Not when I’m told I should be having them. I can’t think I’ll ever be ready, so I’m holding strong to the fact that my first will be an oops. That oops will then set the bar for me (us) wanting (or not wanting) any more.
27- I’ve had many blogs before; One having gained a decent 3 digit following. But alas, I flaked out on ’em all because OMG! THEY KNOW TOO MUCH! I want to both put myself out there and hide from everyone all at the same time. WHY AM I LIKE THIS?
28- Um, mostly because I’m scared of how mean the world can be. I’ve also had some peeps (including my momma) treat me like poopie which totally (momentarily) tricks me into feeling as though I am poopie.
29- BUT I’M READY FOR CHANGE. And like, the big kind. Not just the change of locations, jobs, friends, etc.. I’m talking about a personal change where I totally exit my comfort zone and try doing some of the things I’m afraid of. Such as blogging. And blogging about the fact that I’m about to transition into ACTUAL ADULTHOOD. ‘Cause like. I’m nearly 30 AND going to be living with a boy. A MAN! HOLY SMOKES.
THERE IS SO MUCH TO BE EXCITED FOR! Life is just freakin’ beginning!